I was recalling this song to my friend Kevin the other day. I can’t believe I found the lyrics but now I can share them with you.

Back in highschool, some friends and I went to the local music store to pick out a cassette from the $1 Bargain Bin (typically unknown artists) and see who picked the best, most obscure music. This song won. Enjoy!

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Yuppie Drone by The Pheremones

I recently purchased a TEAC 4100X with 3 heads, 3 motors, and a Sansui 3660, 45 watts per channel, Dolby X, DBX, hi-tech specs, 30 to 20000 hz so I can listen to adult contemporary music … cranked up to 3.

In my 3-level attached suburban townhouse with a community pool and rec room, 495 p.i. year 1 through 3, 795 p.i. years 3 through 35, thousand others in the 3-blocks square, they don’t know I’m there … unless I park in their parking space.

I traded my GTO for a Jap Jet 300 ZX, then a BMW, 5-speed, A/C, P/B, P/S, 2 bucket seats, sound system hurts my ears, goes fast (55), personalized license plate that says “Sparky” (Sparky) (Sparky) … but it’s in the shop.

[chorus] Yuppie Drone. Yuppie Drone. Yuppie Drone. Yuppie Drone. Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yup- Yuppie Drone

I wake up early with Mister Coffee, jump in the carpool with Fred and Alice and Charlie so we can drive downtown, predawn, in the express lane, HOV-4, 395, 6 a.m., it doesn’t matter … it still takes an hour to go 5 miles.

I wear a suit and tie but I still have lots of T-shirts that I don’t wear - there’s no time. I got out of college and freaked, so I grabbed a job with a big corporation that treats me like POOP. But I don’t care ’cause the pay’s OK and the benefits are great … Don’t ask me what we make.

[chorus]

Me and my lady-person who I met at the happy hour, 4 to 7, at Chumley’s Bar downtown during a snowstorm last year. We both love margueritas and Jimmy Buffet, TOOT, jogging, jacuzzis, and shopping at Dart Drug, “Compare and Save,” “We will not be undersold.” … (You Bet!)

I trusted George in ‘72, hated Tricky Dicky with a passion, championed the poor down-trodden masses. Don’t call me middle-class. What’s mine is mine. I don’t like war, but the bread is good. Ronnie’s not so bad as Fritz or Carter’s hicks. Right is new, left is out, twist and shout.

I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and house. I love my car and…

[chorus twice]